September 5th 2006

haha where to begin.  it hasnt even been a full week yet and i have so much that went on.  Ok well Friday kicked off the second stop of the world tour, a little gathering of the closet group of friends for some random mayheim and drinking of epic perportions. just recalling all that happend, turns the liver, fogs the memory, and fills my call log on the cellie (haha ya i caled alot of people).

 

ok so there was friday.  went to work like normal, got home and showered and shaved.  went out for a little dinner and martinis at this place called legends.  my buddy cody works there.  me and nic went, played some golden tee, drank some, then went over to twisters. beer and shots passed before we left there in time to pick up a tweleve pack and a 5th of jagr for my buddy codys house, the usuall after bar party.  with all of that gone, we fell asleep(or on the floor then to sleep).

 

Woke up saturday, not feeling like a million dollars like i had so badly hoped for.  from there to some running around, more shower, no shave, tiny bit of food, and then to my buddy derecks kegger. IT WAS A BLAST!!!! trust me 2 kegs, tons of cases of beer, 150 people, all celebrating his new job and my birthday.  much much drinking, then back to codys(do you get the theme so far of the after after party spot).  more drinking, some random movie then passing out.

 

then to the actuall birthday.  yes sunday. we started off the morning in fine fashion by going back to twisters, but this time at 10:30 in the morning.  shots beers, then off to the cards game.  right behind home plate, next to the announcers booth.  god what great seats.  more beer, three albert pujols home runs  and we win.  yes what a great day for sure.  then back to twisters for pool, and more shots and beer.  then it was off to nates for a easy night of what was suppose to be some martinis, but ended up in everyone passing out.  woke up later and off to the home for sleep.

 

monday, very uneventful, just sleep. 

 

so that was stop two.  keep your eyes peeled next weekend for the 3rd stop off agian in omaha for the king corn carnival.  hehe its a cabbage smelling good time(inside joke with my p-town crew).

 

later……. oh wait movie quote time  “ASK ME ABOUT MY WEINER” from accepted, and yes i did yell that at the bartender at twisters sunday.. hehe it was hiliarious.

August 26th 2006

Aight i totaly forgot about july so lets get a quick recap of that month.  well okay 4th of july i went out camping for a few days and it totaly rocked.  much drinking, much vodka, and saw a guy ride his four wheeler off the side of a hill.  he was ok so it was just funny.  end of july had a buddies birthday party so thats always fun, until later on that day one of the sober drivers crashed with her and 3 of my boys in the car.  the driver(tracy) puntcured her lung, broke her pelvic bone, and broke a few ribs.  shes fine now.  the passenger(nic) who was totaly drunk, not wearing a seat belt or anything only got a concussion and a huge cut above his eye from head butting a tree and winnig(or atleast he has declared he got the best of the tree).  the back seat had nate who just dislocated his shoulder and robbie whos feet got trapped in between the back seat and passenger seat.  they are all ok now.  when we came up on them we thought nic was dead for sure.  really nasty accident they hit a tree at 50 sidewards into the passenger door.  Oh then the next weekend went on a float trip with my couisins jess and julie.  had much fun hanging out with like minded pollocks. ok enough of that shitty month.

 

August was kinda slow at first cause there were a few of the boys laid up with cuts and bruises.  well not much the first few weeks, just a few bbqs and some random fun.  then went to omaha the last weekend of august.  heheh that was a fun time and new pics up from that weekend.  we were celebrating dano and weinbergs birthdays.  much drinking, some boating on the ole’ missouri river, and then more drinking of keg beer.

 

 

ok i think thats it for those two months but stay tuned for next month when i will be posting weekly updates cause there is that much going on.  AND THE 24TH BIRTHDAY IS LABOR DAY WEEKEND SO EVERYONE SEND ME LOVE.  EITHER CALL ME OR LEAVE ME A MESSAGE.  IF YOU DONT HAVE THE CELLY NUMBER AND WANT IT JUST MESSAGE ME.

 

ok no quote this time, its to late at night and im hella tired.

May 28th 2006

God ok time to do this before i go to my friends bar-b-q(whater i cant spell) and drink more.  just to warn you all im hungover bad so if you cant read this im sorry. ok well may what all happened this month.
 
the beginning of the month i went to aconcert, which was pretty good. if ytou have achance to see coheed and cambria live, dont(they suck live).

ok anyways time for the quote of the month, this month by dane cook. “where are you monkey. “im over here”. who wants a bannana sandwhich. “i do”.

March 29th 2006

WEll well look and see what time of the month it is again and its that time children.  time for me to spit to you what all happened this month in my life and dammit you all better read this and leave me lots of comments.

 

OK this has been the busiest month of all for this short year.  If this has any kind of bearing onto how my summer should be then i wont even have time to sleep(but who cares ill sleep when im dead).

 

OK first weekend in this month and teh second i had an old and very dear ex-girlfreind stop in and spend some time with me.  yes jessica im talking about you.  we had a very pleasent time and did cuddle, but that just turned into me kicking her out of my bed. NOw dont feel sorry for her she deserves it she is a horrible blanket hog.

 

ok and birthdays this month lets see my mom, dad, uncle ken, aunt debby, grandpa bert, grandma adela, cousin becky, and my freind nics new bouncing baby boy (god im going to spell this wrong i know it) Johnna Cleud Holmes.

 

OK the third weekend of this month i went on a magic journey to the wonderfuly drunkin land of omaha. i left on a friday what was suppose to be at 8:45pm but turned out to be 10:05pm.  well since i was layed over i decided to drink myself half silly in the bar and on the plane.  oh and by the way dont order a hard drink on the plane they water down their alcohol(bastards).i went up there for my buddy johns 21st birthday.  GOD what a blast.  they rented a bus and 30 of us went out and destroyed the town like only we can.  oh and i saw my first dog race that weekend, man do greyhounds run hella fast.

 

last weekend i relaxed at my buddy codies lake house.  a good time of horse shoes, BBQing and drinking. 

ok i think that is all that happened but i did drink a hell of alot so if anyone knows something i forgot please make sure to tell me.

 

ok this months quote comes from the movie “waiting”

Mithc”Momma said they was my magic shoes, she told me they would take me anywhere.  she also took me out in the backyard and beat me with a agarden house and called me a retard”

March 2nd 2006

hello one and all its that time of the month again where i write stuff that i doubt anyone will read but oh well fuck it.  haha.  ok so february, what can i remember aboutr february.  oh ya there was valentines day(surprise surprise no valetine for me yet again, i blame all of you women for that one) i had a few birthyday parties to go to and then the mother of all parties in my fair city of st louis MARDI GRAS!!!!!! ok so from what i can remember, and what me and a few friends pieced back together it was a freakin blast.  boobs everywhere, beads flying, and of course my mardi gras tradition of beer and shots of jagr.  i came back with a few more beeds then i would have thought i should have(hopefully i didnt do anything stupid) ok so it was a short one this month but ill leave you with another little quote

“confusoious say man who stands on toilet is high on pot”

later gators, i promise march will have SSSOOOO much more stuff

February 4th 2006

Ok so here is my new thing for this year.  once a month(ya right like i can keep to that) im going to post a state of the ryan address(think state of the union if i was a country) telling all of my freinds whats new with wonderful old me.

 

Ok lets start off with janurary.  what a wild and crazy month that was for me personally.

First thing i got really tanked on new years eve and called EVERYONE that i knew(if i didnt call you i dont have your cell number im sorry).

 i had an inflamation of the lining of my lung which hurt like hell to breath for about a week.

I had county drug enforcment cops come breaking thier way into my buddies house cause his neighboor thought that since 4 cars were in his driveway that we must be doing a drug deal.  i mean really there was only 5 people over there and atleast 12 cops.  me and my buddy whos house it was were put in cuffs for being kinda drunk and a little to mouthy, but hell comeon who wouldnt be if there was that many cops with guns in your place.  once the pigs decided that we were all clean they left, and we proceeded to drink alot. yet again more phone cals to everyone that i know(remember if i dont have your number how am i to call you goofs). 

In the love life department, still hating couples though not so much now(haha fight and bickering couples haha).

 

And for the last week of janurary all i could think about was god when will summer start.  im ready for my usuall summer activities; hot weather, blue sunny skies, going to the cardinal games, running around forest park, ted drews ice cream, drinks in the loop, trips to minne le monte, and of course my two favortie things going to the lake and float trips(if you dont understand some of this or all of this ur defintly not from st louis so ask me, ill explain).

OK enough whinning and complaning on to the last of it then off to make some breakfast.  Im healthy, all of my family is healty, all of my freinds are healthy(and not in jail), and its starting to warm up so things are looking up from here.

In the immortal words of Dave Chappelle “no son.  you see you wouldnt understand but this shit is fucked up….. you use to live in my balls.”

Later gators

August 31st 2005

ok so me and my buddies sit around thinking and contemplating the goofiest shit ever.  i wanted to share some of it with you all so that you can understand me just a little bit more.  hold on to your seats and if i piece anyone off, well to bad so sad.

First thing we ever really thought of really hard was what would happen if your eye fell out of your head, and you used your other eye to look at it.  well this to us was completly engrossing.  After long arguments and a few heated debates we came to the following conclussions.  First off if this happened it would be a very freak accident. we decided that what would prolly happen is that your head would poof out like a cartoon characters head after they eat and bomb, then your head would cave in and your brain would come flowing out your ear. gross yes but this is the way life is.  so we thought if that happened to a human what would happen if an animal did it.  Since animals arent as intellegent as humans we just decided that there heads would explode like bombs.  The smaller the animal the larger the explosin.  Thus a tea cup poddle would be a large enough explosion that the world would cease to exist.

OK so with this very scientific debut settled we decided to tackle another issue. now just to remind you these conclusions that we have come to take many many nights and days of arguement.  this one problem came to use one night while we were drinking.  we were talking about girls we knew and wanted a way to decided how hot each of them ones.  now everyone usually does a 1-10 system, but waht is that based on.  this was a perplexing situation.  do you base it off attitude, personality, physical looks. But a girl you didnt know couldnt be based off her personality or attitude so we decided to stay to the physical looks. next what do you judge looks on.  for this answer we decided that it was all based on if the person in question were to hook up with you how likely you would do it. now we decided to still use 10 levels of hooking upness(if that isnt a word it is now). after much more arguing and more vodka we came up with the following system, and i present it for all to use at it is proven by me and my friends and many other people of both genders.

going from least likely to most likely:

1. Uhhhhh!!!!!- not a chance if they were even the last person alive

2. Buh- ok maybe if they were the last perosn alive and no one would ever know about it

3. Dash- couldnt think of anything better

4. Drunk-  explains itself dont it

5. Drinks- after a few everyone looks better

6. No Drinks- ok there fine just the way they are it might happen if no one else better offers

7. OK- OK this is pretty good

8. Good- Yes this will be good if im seen with someone like this

9. DAMN!!!- you know this one cause when you see them you say DAMN!!!!

10. Goddess or God- this would be heaven oh hell ya

ok now to really use this you need atleast 3 people, and always be an odd number. you point out the person in question and take a vote of Uhhhhh!!!!! through God/Goddess.  noweveryone must agree on a Uhhhhh!!!!! or God/Goddess(but if you find one its most likely everyone will agree).  if there is a differing opionion you take the middle or majority rules.  lets say you see a girl and your first buddy says Drunk your next buddy says No Drinks, if you say Drunk or NO Drinks there is no question go with the majority, if you cant decided then you go with the middle which would be Drinks.

 

ok i think this enough for tonight into the view of my life. 

bullet proof piece im out

august 31st 2005

Hmm, my first blog ever.  What do i write.  Well first off my birthday is this Saturday and I have no idea what im going to do for it.  One side of me says just to sit at home and cry cause im gettin older and then the other side says to have a party.  Decisions decisions.  I think this blog is going to be my online journel to help launch my ideas into the mainstream and reach a larger audience, but then who am i kidding people prolly wont read this.  ok so i think this will do for my first entry

August 5th 2006

Ok i have come up with the simple conclusion that polish people weren’t mentto drink beer at all.  everytime i drink beer, even a few beers, i wake up the next day and am totaly in hangover mode.  concoringly(might be another new word) if i drink vodka, i can drink as much as i want and not be hungover at  all. Thusly i have decided that beer is evil, and i wont be drinking it ever again(or atleast not until someone hands me one)

Aight lets start

ok so i use to be somewhat semi-reliable about posting blogs on myspace, then i just didnt care. well ive decided to restart blogging to give myself an avenue to express opinions, share ideas, or anything else that comes to mind.

what you will find in this blog: random hectic chaos. introspective views. music. friends.

well hope you all enjoy the ride with me.